0:00 Introduction and host chat
Intro, under-18 warning and re-direction to www.scarleteen.com; friend me on Twitter and answer questions about what you want on the show, call 206-202-POLY with comments.
- Nan Wise, the Love Coach, is giving a seminar on Operational Intelligence: Understanding and Managing our Emotional and Sexual Systems, Wednesday, November 14th, in New York at the META Center. $30 to enter; $35 at the door. Email TheLoveCoach@aol.com for more info.
- If you haven’t seen it already, the Boobs, boobs, boobs video, a boobiesexual delight, is up on YouTube to promo Polyamory Weekly. More poly-oriented videos will come as I/we the team have time to create them, but if you like, take a look and (also if you like) link to it from your blog or site. Thanks!
5:45 Chat with Nobilis: Why get married?
Nobilis and Minx discuss marriage and listener feedback on his ideas; 9:30 E calls in to say that people bother to get married because of the hundreds of legal rights accorded to married couples; Nobilis advocates taking apart the components of marriage instead of seeing it as all one blob and deciding what aspects of marriage the government wants to reward and why
14:15 Laura (who asked about the point of marriage at all to begin with) calls in to comment that a lot of bitterness in divorce could be avoided if we could have a ritual or contract that ends earlier or at a specific point; Nobilis says that we need a way to renegotiate our relationships as time goes on and compares marriages to our process for reevaluating our elected officials; he comments that any relationship ending will be painful, but negotiating the hole can help with ameliorating the pain of feeling like a failure
25:00Raina suggests negotiating marriages in advance instead of after the fact and choosing the type of marriage–a year and a day, lifetime, etc. and taking the type of relationship into consideration; Nobilis comments that a lot of our ideas of marriage come from an era when the wife needed protection; Minx and Nobilis discuss how to construct a household and who gets what rights
37:00 Dollfan wrote in doubting the “magic number” in terms of itch–seven years? four? two? nothing specific and not necessarily related to the amount of time to raise children; Nobilis tells of a culture in which a man coming of age is married to an older, infertile woman whose job is to teach the man to become a good husband, and the marriage is dissolved when the man is ready for marriage
If you like the bumper music for Nobilis’ and my conversation, it’s We Are Together by Quebb, available for free download from Podshow
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