PW 377: What commitment means

LustyGuy and Cunning Minx handfastingWhy have a handfasting or any type of public commitment ceremony?

Audio clip: Adobe Flash Player (version 9 or above) is required to play this audio clip. Download the latest version here. You also need to have JavaScript enabled in your browser.

Download the mp3 directly

1:00 HostChat

Welcome our sponsor, GetSTDTested. Use code polyweekly to save 10% at checkout!

4:00 Topic: What does commitment mean to you?

In light of our commitment ceremony last week, listener Vir wrote in to ask about why we decided to commit as well as

  • What did your vows cover?
  • What happens when someone breaks that promise?
  • Why makes your promise in front of witnesses different from what you were already doing?
  • What will the renewal process look like?
  • What did this ceremony give you that you didn’t already have?

Excellent questions, and ones that, frankly, even monogamous couples entering a traditional marriage should be able to answer as well!

18:00 Special segment: Minx and LustyGuy’s commitment ceremony

Our beach handfasting, officiated by L, with my friends M and J reading as well.

27:45 Happy Poly Moment

Rachel in NYC writes in to share a great first poly experience!

31:00 Thanks

Thanks for Hayley and Rachel for their generous donations this week!

32:00 Wrap up

Questions? Comments? Feedback? Email polyweekly@gmail.com or call the listener comment line at 802-505-POLY. And hey, why not attach an audio comment to that email? :-) Check out PolyWeekly at Blubrry.com. Share this with a friend or write an iTunes review!

PW 375: Minx’s big announcement

 

Our handfasting ceremony journal and ribbons

Our handfasting ceremony journal and ribbons

Minx and LustyGuy share a personal announcement

Audio clip: Adobe Flash Player (version 9 or above) is required to play this audio clip. Download the latest version here. You also need to have JavaScript enabled in your browser.

Download the mp3 directly

1:00 Host chat

Welcome our sponsor, GetSTDTested. Use code polyweekly to save 10% at checkout!

4:30 Topic: Minx’s big announcement

Minx, LustyGuy and L are headed to Costa Rica for their commitment ceremony, with L officiating. Minx and LustyGuy share stories of how it came about and some of the mononormative pitfalls they ran across.

22:45 Happy Poly Moment

Kev shares stories of poly meetup groups in Sweden for fikas as well as a poly pub crawl, something we should implement in Seattle! Swedish Poly Organization

26:30 Wrap up

Questions? Comments? Feedback? Email polyweekly@gmail.com or call the listener comment line at 802-505-POLY. And hey, why not attach an audio comment to that email? :-) Check out PolyWeekly at Blubrry.com. Share this with a friend or write an iTunes review!

PW 350: To fight or not to fight… for poly marriage

Is legalization of poly marriage worth the battle?

Audio clip: Adobe Flash Player (version 9 or above) is required to play this audio clip. Download the latest version here. You also need to have JavaScript enabled in your browser.

Download the mp3 directly

1:00 Announcements and host chat

  • I will be hosting a poly panel and helping to emcee at Conflation in Saint Louis February 22-24
  • Also a Write Your Own User Manual session followed by a meet and greet at Shameless Grounds coffee shop on Sunday, February 24th at 7:00 PM. Come join us! Calendar info
  • Hidden Social: Where Sexual Variants Gather Online session at SXSWi on Sunday, March 10, 3:30 PM with Herb Coleman, Adjunct Professor of Psychology at UT Austin ( #hiddensoc )
  • Content Creation for the Online Activist on Sunday, March 17th at 10:30 AM in D.C. at CatalystCon ( #ccon )
  • Want to help send Minx to SXSWi and CatalystCon this year? We just need 10 $96 donations so I can eat! And we LOVE $69 and $96 donations!

6:00 Topic: should we fight for legalization of poly marriage?

Mistress Matisse’s article on the legalization of poly marriage debate: You May Now Kiss the Bride and the Other Bride and the Other Bride and the Other Groom: Why Poly Marriage Is Never Going to Happen

What are your thoughts on fighting to legalize poly marriage? Do you care? Would you fight for it for the next 20 years like the gays did?

17:50 Happy Poly Moment

Vicki shares a fun snogging-oriented happy poly moment

19:45 Feedback

  • CL wrote in to quote a study on how long it actually takes to create a habit. Turns out, it’s not the oft-quoted 21 days, but anywhere from 21 to 84 days, depending on the habit. Source: Author: Jeremy Dean; Title: Making Habits, Breaking Habits; Publisher: Da Capo Press; Date: Copyright 2013 by Jeremy Dean; Pages: 3-7
  • Space Hippie Geek wrote in to respond to episode 300 on couple privilege and took issue with three points:
    • conflating a triad and a vee (in a vee there is no romantic relationship between two of the partners)
    • pointing out (quite rightly) that, “don’t only want to feel as if I’m being added onto an established family. I also want to feel that my boyfriend is joining my family. Even if I don’t have another partners, and am not close to my birth family. Even just by myself, I am a family, a household. I have my own traditions, customs, and ways of doing things.”
    • While there are benefits to having everyone talk together, communicating as a group isn’t always necessary.
    • Mitch advocates for my voice not being used for the proliferation of toxic sludge

29:45  Wrap up

Questions? Comments? Feedback? Email polyweekly@gmail.com or call the listener comment line at 802-505-POLY (our new number!). And hey, why not attach an audio comment to that email? :-) Check out PolyWeekly at Blubrry.com. Share this with a friend or write an iTunes review!

PW 333: This week in poly

What happen in the polysphere this week? Civil unions in Brazil, solo polys and Republicans on the female anatomy.

Audio clip: Adobe Flash Player (version 9 or above) is required to play this audio clip. Download the latest version here. You also need to have JavaScript enabled in your browser.

Download the mp3 directly

1:00 News and host chat

  • I’ll be giving Content Creation for the Online Activist at CatalystCon September 14-16 in Long Beach

3:40 This week in poly

25:00 Happy Poly Moment

  • Ryan in Denver shares a cuddly HPM
  • Rob shares a nekked camping HPM in Missouri

29:00 Feedback

  • Joan MADE MY DAY with her heartfelt thanks for episode 330 on welcoming a third into your relationship

32:00 Thanks

Thanks to Eric, Joan and John for the donations this week!

Questions? Comments? Feedback? Email polyweekly@gmail.com or call the listener comment line at 802-505-POLY (our new number!). And hey, why not attach an audio comment to that email? :-) Check out PolyWeekly at Blubrry.com. Share this with a friend or write an iTunes review!


PW 323: Everything you need to know about the history of gay marriage in the church

Did you know that for hundreds of years, the Catholic church performed same sex unions and has never declared marriage to be between one man and one woman?

Audio clip: Adobe Flash Player (version 9 or above) is required to play this audio clip. Download the latest version here. You also need to have JavaScript enabled in your browser.

Download the mp3 directly

Introduction

Under-18 warning and redirection to Scarleteen

1:00 News and host chat

Richard Wagner, Dr. Dick7:00 Topic: What you need to know about the church and gay mar

riage

Welcome to our special guest, Richard Wagner, otherwise known as Dr. Dick of Dr. Dick’s Sex Advice, a former priest and sexologist. Dr. Wagner debunks common misbeliefs about gay marriage, citing historical evidence that up until the 14th century, the church conducted same-sex unions, had an Office of Same Sex Unions and has never defined marriage as being between a man and a woman; in fact, it seemed to avoid using those terms.

Articles discussed: When Same Sex Marriage Was a Christian Rite, Same-Sex Unions in Premodern Europe by historian John Boswell

Dr. Wagner’s new book, the Amateur’s Guide to Death and Dying.

30:00 Thanks

Thanks to Shana, whom I had the pleasure of meeting at OpenSF, for the generous $200 donation!

32:00 Wrapup

Questions? Comments? Feedback? Email polyweekly@gmail.com or call the listener comment line at 206-202-POLY. And hey, why not attach an audio comment to that email? :-) Check out PolyWeekly at Blubrry.com. Share this with a friend or write an iTunes review!

zp8497586rq

PW 319: Marriage as a choice

Thoughts on marriage as a conscious relationship and lifestyle choice rather than the default or the result of peer pressure

Audio clip: Adobe Flash Player (version 9 or above) is required to play this audio clip. Download the latest version here. You also need to have JavaScript enabled in your browser.

Download the mp3 directly

Introduction

Under-18 warning and redirection to Scarleteen

1:20 News and host chat

3:10 Topic: Marriage as a conscious choice

A recent Huffington Post personal essay questioning marriage as peer pressure in the 20-30 age range as well as:

  • The possibility that even with a lot of love and communication, it might not be enough and the marriage might need to end
  • The groupthink that marriage is hard but always worth it
  • The lack of alternative relationship choices
  • Marriage as the default rather than a custom option

20:20 Feedback on episode 316 Queer as a verb

  • Alyssa writes in to say “Sometimes the radical, panties-in-a-bunch, queers need to chill the fuck out, and what better way to chill out than to realize that something you revolve your life around isn’t a big deal to EVERYONE!”
  • Vir writes in to say that I’ve queered my relationship and my sex life (through kink/fetishes)

24:10 Thanks

Thanks to Meg for the donation this week!

Wrapup

Questions? Comments? Feedback? Email polyweekly@gmail.com or call the listener comment line at 206-202-POLY. And hey, why not attach an audio comment to that email? :-) Check out PolyWeekly at Blubrry.com. Share this with a friend or write an iTunes review!

PW 318: The New Monogamy

Dr. Tammy Nelson shares how the world of online dating, social media and texting has changed marriage and monogamy

Audio clip: Adobe Flash Player (version 9 or above) is required to play this audio clip. Download the latest version here. You also need to have JavaScript enabled in your browser.

Download the mp3 directly

Introduction

Under-18 warning and redirection to Scarleteen

2:00 The New Monogamy with Dr. Tammy Nelson

Dr. Tammy Nelson, therapist and author of a soon-to-be-released book on The New Monogamy, answers questions on the new state of monogamy:

  • Has marriage gone out of fashion?
  • How has online dating affected marriage?
  • Do those who identify as monogamous need to expect infidelity?
  • Are Facebook and texting to blame for affairs?
  • Are affairs actually good for a marriage?
  • What is the new monogamy?

31:40 Feedback

Jess writes in to thank PW for helping her poly family through the introduction of HPV and the tools to help the group be level-headed and talk openly and honestly.

Wrapup

Questions? Comments? Feedback? Email polyweekly@gmail.com or call the listener comment line at 206-202-POLY. And hey, why not attach an audio comment to that email? :-) Check out PolyWeekly at Blubrry.com. Share this with a friend or write an iTunes review!

PW 308: Poly in the Month of Love

Being poly in America February 2012–how did the world treat nonmonogamy this Valentine’s Day?

Audio clip: Adobe Flash Player (version 9 or above) is required to play this audio clip. Download the latest version here. You also need to have JavaScript enabled in your browser.

Download the mp3 directly

Introduction

Under 18? Stop listening now and visit http://www.scarleteen.com

1:00 News and host chat

  • Thanks for your patience with the audio—think we’ve fixed it

4:20 Topic: Being poly in February 2012 for Valentine’s Day

Poly in the media and how love and relationships are being viewed for this year’s Valentine’s Day.

22:10 Feedback

  • Musqurat calls in to correct my assertion that the word “polyamory” was coined by Morning Glory Zell. In fact, she used the word “polyamorous;” the word “polyamory” was first used by Jennifer Wesp in the Usenet group in 1992.
  • Fred writes in to share that he found his identity as a monoamorist who likes occasional play with others.

25:10 Wrapup


Questions? Comments? Feedback? Email polyweekly@gmail.com or call the listener comment line at 206-202-POLY. And hey, why not attach an audio comment to that email? :-) Check out PolyWeekly at Blubrry.com. Share this with a friend or write an iTunes review!

PW 289: The Sister Wives lawsuit–and why you should care

The Sister Wives lawsuit and how it affects polyamorists

Alan from Poly in the Media covers the crux of the Sister Wives lawsuit–and why polyamorists should care

Audio clip: Adobe Flash Player (version 9 or above) is required to play this audio clip. Download the latest version here. You also need to have JavaScript enabled in your browser.

Download the mp3 directly

Introduction

Under 18? Stop listening now and visithttp://www.scarleteen.com

1:00 Announcements

2:25 Suing with the Sister Wives

Alan from Poly in Media shares the details of the Sister Wives lawsuit and point out that this is as close to a lawsuit for the right to privacy within a poly relationship as we will ever find in the mainstream media.

  • Kodi Brown and his four wives’ family structure; only Kodi and Meri are legally married; the rest live together and call each other “sister wives” but are not legally married
  • The difference from other poly court cases that some poly groups have been leery of aligning with
  • The constitutional right/issue being questioned here–NOT the right to marry but the right to cohabitate lovingly in peace.
  • The reaction within the poly leadership community
  • What are the benefits of poly leaders aligning with and supporting this case? What are the drawbacks?
  • What is happening with the case right now

Links: Sister Wives challenge anti-polygamy law

Poly Events

21:00 Book Review: Resident Aliens

Book review by Kurt on the Joe Ashby Porter novel. Not a book to run out and buy, but a book with poly characters.

24:45 Feedback

  • Matt from Detroit rants on marriage, what it really means and adding preachers and legislation into marriage.
  • Lissie in Cleveland asks for more information on the kinky bed and breakfast in Michigan
  • Jeannie in Vermont comments on Sister Wives and asks why polys wouldn’t promote polygamous pride in Utah—she would.

47:20 Wrap-up

Questions? Comments? Feedback? Email polyweekly@gmail.com and attach an audio comment or call the listener comment line at 206-202-POLY. Friend us on Twitter or Facebook or leave a comment here. Check out PolyWeekly podcasts at polyweekly.libsyn.com. Share this with a friend or write an iTunes review! Want Poly Weekly for your very own? Get the Best of Poly Weekly collection from PodDisc.com Our intro and outro music is courtesy of Pacemaker Jane, “Good Suspicions.”

PW 281: Infidelity will keep us together

What do you think of Dan Savage’s NYT article on non-monogamy?

Audio clip: Adobe Flash Player (version 9 or above) is required to play this audio clip. Download the latest version here. You also need to have JavaScript enabled in your browser.

Download the mp3 directly

Introduction

Under 18? Stop listening now and visit http://www.scarleteen.com

2:45 Book review

PW book reviewer Kurt review’s Kathy Labriola’s Love in Abudance, a Counselor’s Guide to Opening Relationships The book deals with poly effects on current relationships, including dealing with demotion, displacement and intrusion.

8:20 Poly movie review: La Belle Epoque

PW film reviewer Joreth reviews the 1992 Spanish poly-ish film, la Belle Epoque.

15:30 Topic: Dan Savage’s take on infidelity

Discussing the huge, seven-page article in the New York Times exploring Dan Savage’s take on infidelity and the role it plays in keeping monogamous relationships together.

32:45 Feedback

  • John from Lacy responds to 276, “Okay” is a four-letter word, claiming responsibility for communication falls on all parties
  • Emily calls in from a smallish Midwestern college town and asks about Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell in her relationship. If she isn’t comfortable with it, what should she do?

Josh calls in to muse on the question of why we get married to begin with. What is your reason?

45:15 Wrap-up

Questions? Comments? Feedback? Email polyweekly@gmail.com and attach an audio comment or call the listener comment line at 206-202-POLY. Friend us on Twitter or Facebook, leave a comment here or discuss your own topics at the forums. Check out PolyWeekly podcasts at polyweekly.libsyn.com. Share this with a friend or write an iTunes review! Want Poly Weekly for your very own? Get the Best of Poly Weekly collection from PodDisc.com Our intro and outro music is courtesy of Pacemaker Jane, “Good Suspicions.”

Make a Donation

Poly Weekly Playmates!

Wanna play?

Poly Weekly on Facebook

Poly Weekly on Twitter