The new Polyamory Weekly #133: Does jealousy equal love? is up! Direct download is at Poly Weekly #133

Subscribe now with iTunes one-click!
Please Digg this podcast at Digg’s PW podcast page!

0:00 Introduction and host chat
Intro, under-18 warning and re-direction to; friend me on Twitter and answer questions about what you want on the show, call 206-202-POLY with comments.

1:30 Announcement: Many Loves workshop
This workshop and support series takes place at the Center on Halsted in Chicago, Saturday, December 8th, $15, 10:00 a.m.-1:00 p.m. I’ll be there!

2:25 Topic: Does jealousy equal love?
Bill guest co-hosts to discuss this topic that Gafil brought up–why is it that the more deeply we love someone, the more intense the jealousy can feel? Why in our society does a lack of a jealous rage mean a lack of love?

25:10 Resource Review: Operational Intelligence
Sukima calls in a comprehensive review of Nan Wise’s Operational Intelligence in New York from November; 29:20 Trace calls in his experience of the same seminar and what he took home; if you’re in the area, be sure to check out PolyamorousNYC that meets the third Wednesday of every month

31:35 Wrap-up
Questions? Comments? Feedback? Email or call the listener comment line at 206-202-POLY. And hey, why not attach an audio comment to that email? 🙂 Check out PolyWeekly at Thanks for listening!


Commenting area

  1. I’m listening to this podcast right now, and I am a little surprised by the absence of any mention or consideration of evolutionary biology. Much of our psychological world, particularly when it comes to relationships and mating, has been hardwired into us over the last several million years.

    Jealousy and love are as old as history itself. We can intellectualize all we want, but these feelings likely served some sort of adaptive purpose.

    The human mind is surely the most complex thing on planet Earth, so we can imagine and think ourselves out of the paths hardwired into us over the millennium, but only to a certain degree and with much effort. Also, sometimes there can be rewards for succumbing to these hardwired paths.

    While I don’t think jealousy equals love, I think a complete lack of jealousy, in most situations, either means a lack of caring or else an abundance of security, or more than likely a combination of the two. In the case of an abundance of security, one could argue there must also be present a certain naivety. After all, are any of us really that secure?

    Maybe people who don’t experience jealousy have somehow learned to deal with their insecurity. That begs the question though… did they deal with it simply by emotionally distancing themselves? Quite likely. They reduced their risk essentially. But, can you really love and not risk?

Comments are now closed for this article.