The new Polyamory Weekly #141: You’re Fat, redux is up! Direct download is at Poly Weekly #141

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0:00 Introduction and host chat
Intro, under-18 warning and re-direction to; friend me on Twitter and answer questions about what you want on the show, call 206-202-POLY with comments or discuss your own topics at the new FORUMS at

2:00 Announcements & Promo stuff

8:50 Topic: You’re Fat!, redux: How much honesty is too much honesty?

  1. First type of response: society is wrong (she shouldn’t have to lose the weight; he should still find her attractive; as a culture, we’re overweight)
  2. 17:30 Second type of response: try the indirect approach; use positive reinforcement (invite your partner on your walks
  3. 20:00 Third type of response: find out what’s at the root of the weight gain (depression, poor self-esteem) and address that; there is usually a reason people stop taking care of themselves; consider that this is affecting the sexual desire of both partners, not just the man;
  4. 26:00 Fourth type of response: if you have built trust with your partner, you can bring up any issue, even weight gain (if you have a history of bringing up difficult issues for the good of the relationship, your partner will have faith in you in this, too)

34:50 Wrap-up
Questions? Comments? Feedback? Email or call the listener comment line at 206-202-POLY. And hey, why not attach an audio comment to that email? 🙂 Check out PolyWeekly at Thanks for listening!


Commenting area

  1. This website should be required reading for any conversation surrounding this issue:
    “But Don’t You Realize Fat Is Unhealthy?”

  2. Vir Modestus February 12, 2008 at 9:54 am · ·

    I enjoyed the show and left a voice comment. But this one works better as a post. There is a great discussion of this exact topic here: I’d recommend it highly.

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