The new Polyamory Weekly #154: Metamour Relations is up! Direct download is at Poly Weekly #154

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0:00 Introduction and host chat
Intro, under-18 warning and re-direction to; friend me on Twitter and answer questions about what you want on the show, call 206-202-POLY with comments or discuss your own topics at the new FORUMS at

1:00 Host Chat
Poly Weekly book club’s discussion of Eros, a Journey of Multiple Loves; hmmm why not start a PW movie club? And then we got derailed and began discussing today’s topic, metamour relations.

2:40 Announcement
Broom Street Theater in Madison, Wisconsin has put on a stage interpretation of The Ethical Slut, which runs through June 8th

3:00 Roundtable: Metamour Relations
Alan’s metamour not only spoke with him but loaned him instructive books; Chris and his family tend to meet people as friends first, anyway
5:30 What does “friend” level entail in the case of metamours
7:15 dealing with awkwardness of meeting metamours for the first time; forcing a friendship; openness, trust and respect is required, like in a business relationship
12:30 dealing with a metamour you don’t trust; Buffy and Faith as metamours finally finding a way to connect
18:00 how does a metamour come in to an existing dynamic? whose job is it to work on the weirdness?
23:00 communication styles
26:30 how can we make it easier on secondaries coming in? how much responsibility goes to the “hinge” between current and new partner
34:00 knowing how you want to be treated and communicating that; dealing with NRE and how much time/energy you put into it; knowing the existing partners’ dynamic

40:30 Wrap-up
Questions? Comments? Feedback? Email or call the listener comment line at 206-202-POLY. And hey, why not attach an audio comment to that email? 🙂 Check out PolyWeekly at Thanks for listening!

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Our intro and outro music is courtesy of Pacemaker Jane, “Good Suspicions”


Commenting area

  1. Christopher xox May 22, 2008 at 7:00 am · ·

    Hi Minx,
    I am a listener and interested guy from Germany, living in Holland, Amsterdam.
    I would like to meet you and other lovely people, and I heard about a camping in Canada.
    Will you be in Canada for this event, I can´t find the internet site any more? Where else could I meet you and others in Canada (I know!! that you are in the US, but I would like to see Canada and poly on one trip. I also have a friend in Toronto.)
    I am in need of good discussions and friends because I just can´t make up my mind if this is for me and if I am willing to (possibliy) sacrifice my current relationship. I also want to meet people outside Holland I have so many questions and I am just Soooo curious!!!! My heart is aching!!

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