How does a poly and kink newbie handle dating a monogamous submissive?

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1:00 Host chat

LustyGuy cohosts! And for some reason, we start talking about anal dildos.

2:00 Topic: I’m new to poly and kink and trying to date a monogamous partner covertly

Jason writes in to ask advice. He’s new to both poly and kink. He’s in love with a new married partner who identifies as monogamous, sees him without her husband’s consent and claims to no longer love her husband.

Minx mentions NLE = New Lifestyle Energy. The pull and power of the first poly and/or kink relationship can be exhilarating and overwhelming… and can lead to some bad decisions.

19:00 Wrap up

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Commenting area

  1. I like the points made in this episode, including New Lifestyle Energy. Just as NRE does not always get recognized for what it is, NLE can have a serious influence in decision-making without its impact being recognized.

  2. Week–

    Thanks! I think I just coined that term. It’s hard to explain to those who haven’t experienced it how very earth-shattering and life-changing the first lifestyle relationship can be. And when in that relationship, it’s nearly impossible to understand that a large chunk of the energy is from the lifestyle and not exclusive to the individual who showed it to you.

  3. I really would like some info on running a poly group as I just jumped in with our four feet and we are trying to swim. We are a couple who had a poly relationship for about a year but it happened by accident and quite subtle. We have experienced swinger life (3years) while looking for what we want. Sometimes along the way we put a name to it and it is called polyamory.

    We have a decade of experience running non profits and meetups but poly not so much. I loved your section on starting a meetup and would really like more.

    Now talking to Atlanta poly and a member but we are in Calgary Canada btw thanks for your stuff so far ur pod casts are great

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