My husband and I disagree on how soon to meet metamours–how do we negotiate this?

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negotiating metamour meets


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1:00 Host chat

Tina Horn’s excellent response to Pamela Anderson’s new anti-porn stance

4:15 Poly in the News

A clueless journalist’s ignorance on display and the community response to it

7:45 Topic: Negotiating metamour meets

Listener Michelle writes in to ask about how to negotiate metamour meetings when she wants to meet metamours right away, but her husband would rather wait a few weeks. Or months. Or never. She writes that he agrees reluctantly to meet partners, and to introduce her to his, but they are not sure how to determine when we should introduce new partners to each other. She feels like she’d rather meet his new partners after no more than two or three dates, whereas he thinks that seems unnecessarily soon. How can they solve the impasse?

  • What do you need to be happy and healthy?
  • What does he need to be happy and healthy?
  • Negotiate from there
  • Find ways to make it more comfortable and less awkward
  • In general, as with safer sex, the lowest common denominator wins

14:30 Feedback

  • A writes about the challenges of asexuality because A does seek romantic relationships and appears mainstream, but “sex gets in the way” and is happy we are talking more about asexuality
  • Christina writes in about how hard she, as a poly meetup organizer, works to promote tolerance and acceptance of her group, including discrimination against monogamy and monogamists

19:00 Happy Poly Moment

  • GreedyPaul called in to say he was courageous and started his own poly group!
  • Sean writes in that his mistress is welcome for the weekend!

22:00 Wrap up

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