Poly Weekly #143: New Relationship Energy: the Good, the Bad and the Ugly

The new Polyamory Weekly #143: is up! Direct download is at Poly Weekly #143

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Please Digg this podcast at Digg’s PW podcast page!

0:00 Introduction and host chat
Intro, under-18 warning and re-direction to www.scarleteen.com; friend me on Twitter and answer questions about what you want on the show, call 206-202-POLY with comments or discuss your own topics at the new FORUMS at http://forum.polyweekly.com.

2:00 Promo stuff
Promo for Sex 2.0 in Atlanta–come and be sex-positive with us!

2:30 Topic with Guest; Katie: New Relationship Energy
New Relationship Energy as defined by Wikipedia; Ravenscroft‘s definition is that it is the period of time when your obsession with the relationship overcomes your common sense; Helen Fisher’s book, Why We Love was the source for the brain chemistry comments; 9:40 what NOT to do when in the throes of NRE; 16:45 try asking your NRE crush what other people say about him/her; talk to the last partner if you can; nice thing about poly is that a current partner (who isn’t wearing the love goggles) can give an outside perspective

26:10 Wrap-up

Minx is off to
Conflation this weekend to dress as Inara

Questions? Comments? Feedback? Email cunningminx@gmail.com or call the listener comment line at 206-202-POLY. And hey, why not attach an audio comment to that email? :-) Check out PolyWeekly at polyweekly.libsyn.com. Thanks for listening!

Our intro and outro music is courtesy of Pacemaker Jane, “Good Suspicions”

Poly Weekly #142: LIVE from Arisia Sci-Fi

The new Polyamory Weekly #142: Live from the Arisia science-fiction convention is up! Direct download is at Poly Weekly #142

Subscribe now with iTunes one-click!
Please Digg this podcast at Digg’s PW podcast page!

0:00 Introduction and host chat
Intro, under-18 warning and re-direction to www.scarleteen.com; friend me on Twitter and answer questions about what you want on the show, call 206-202-POLY with comments or discuss your own topics at the new FORUMS at http://forum.polyweekly.com.

1:30 Announcements & Promo stuff

  • Next weekend, I’ll be hosting both a podcasting and polyamory panel at Conflation in Saint Louis. This year is a Firefly theme, and I can’t wait to try out my new Inara costume!
  • Next meeting of the Poly Weekly Book Club will be Wednesday, February 27th, 6:00-9:00 p.m. at the Center on Halsted, 2nd floor, white couches; we’ll be continuing our discussion of Ravenscroft’s Polyamory: Roadmaps for the Clueless and the Hopeful
  • Upcoming workshops: And Boyfriend/Girlfriend Makes Three: Negotiating Nonmonogamy, Saturday, February 23rd, noon-1:30 p.m., A Woman’s Touch in Madison; or Wednesday, March 19th, 6:00-7:30 in Milwaukee

  • 3:25 Promo for Nawashi, a novel of erotic magic, available from Podiobooks.com
  • The new Poly Weekly promo will be up in the feed next

  • We’re trying to get 100 reviews on iTunes; if you’d like, please review Poly Weekly by clicking here!
  • 5:30 Report: Poly Panels at the Arisia Science Fiction Convention
    Alan interviews Shava from a panel on being poly in a straight world; Michelle Wexelblack discusses poly-mono relationship; 14:00 Dr. Solomon Davidoff discusses the poly community compared to other subcultures; Alan talks about creating a temporary tribe

    17:50 Topic: Why Does My Spouse Irritate Me So Much?
    Minx discusses this article on marriage only getting worse–your spouse will end up annoying the heck outta you!

    21:45 Wrap-up
    Questions? Comments? Feedback? Email cunningminx@gmail.com or call the listener comment line at 206-202-POLY. And hey, why not attach an audio comment to that email? :-) Check out PolyWeekly at polyweekly.libsyn.com. Thanks for listening!

    Our intro and outro music is courtesy of Pacemaker Jane, “Good Suspicions”

Poly Weekly #141: You’re Fat! Redux

The new Polyamory Weekly #141: You’re Fat, redux is up! Direct download is at Poly Weekly #141

Subscribe now with iTunes one-click!
Please Digg this podcast at Digg’s PW podcast page!
0:00 Introduction and host chat
Intro, under-18 warning and re-direction to www.scarleteen.com; friend me on Twitter and answer questions about what you want on the show, call 206-202-POLY with comments or discuss your own topics at the new FORUMS at http://forum.polyweekly.com.

2:00 Announcements & Promo stuff

8:50 Topic: You’re Fat!, redux: How much honesty is too much honesty?

  1. First type of response: society is wrong (she shouldn’t have to lose the weight; he should still find her attractive; as a culture, we’re overweight)
  2. 17:30 Second type of response: try the indirect approach; use positive reinforcement (invite your partner on your walks
  3. 20:00 Third type of response: find out what’s at the root of the weight gain (depression, poor self-esteem) and address that; there is usually a reason people stop taking care of themselves; consider that this is affecting the sexual desire of both partners, not just the man;
  4. 26:00 Fourth type of response: if you have built trust with your partner, you can bring up any issue, even weight gain (if you have a history of bringing up difficult issues for the good of the relationship, your partner will have faith in you in this, too)

34:50 Wrap-up
Questions? Comments? Feedback? Email cunningminx@gmail.com or call the listener comment line at 206-202-POLY. And hey, why not attach an audio comment to that email? :-) Check out PolyWeekly at polyweekly.libsyn.com. Thanks for listening!

Poly Weekly Book Club: Wednesday, February 27th

Thanks so much to everyone who came out to the Poly Weekly Book Club last night! We ended up with about a dozen folks, all heatedly discussing Ravenscroft’s book. Some had read the book in its entirety; some still had it on order; some (like me) had read about half. One guy even drove in from Green Bay just for the event! (But we all think he’s crazy)

We talked about the poly community (whether there was one), the significance of labels like primary/secondary and why we treat people the way we do; converting to poly being as all-encompassing as converting to a new religion; why the print in the book is so damn tiny; and why there are no good resources for secondaries out there.

After three hours, the group felt there was still more to discuss, so we’re going to finish the book and continue discussing it next month. So, for next month:

Wednesday, February 27th, 6:00-9:00 p.m.
Poly Weekly Book Club

Anthony Ravenscroft’s Polyamory: Roadmaps for the Clueless and the Hopeful, Redux
The Center on Halsted, 3656 N. Halsted
2nd floor, on the white sofas

We dont’ have a meeting room, so look for us on the second floor on the white sofas.

Poly Weekly Skypecast: Roadmaps for the Clueless and the Hopeful

Want to read and discuss Ravenscroft’s Polyamory: Roadmaps for the Clueless and the Hopeful but aren’t in Chicago? Join us for the Poly Weekly Skypecast discussion on Saturday, January 26th at 1:00 p.m. Central time!

The book is quite long, so we’ll be discussing just Part I, up to page 102, “Background and history.” Please call in and join us for this hour-long discussion based on the wonderfully opinionated Ravenscroft’s analysis of poly!

Poly Weekly #137: Ten Poly Vocab Words You Need to Know

The new Polyamory Weekly #1367: Ten Poly Vocab Words You Need to Know is up! Direct download is at Poly Weekly #137

Subscribe now with iTunes one-click!
Please Digg this podcast at Digg’s PW podcast page!

0:00 Introduction and host chat
Intro, under-18 warning and re-direction to www.scarleteen.com; friend me on Twitter and answer questions about what you want on the show, call 206-202-POLY with comments.

1:30 Announcement: Chicago Poly Book Club
This is the Poly Book Club, a fun discussion group for anyone who’s been *meaning* to read those books on poly but hasn’t quite got around to it. Or for those who read the books but didn’t have anyone like-minded to discuss the more interesting questions with!

Our first book will be one I’ve been dying to read, Polyamory: Roadmaps for the Clueless and Hopeful, by Anthony Ravenscroft.

Other details:

When: Wednesday, January 30th, 6:00-9:00 p.m.
Where: The Center on Halsted lobby/social area (by the fireplace), 3656 North Halsted Street
What: Polyamory: Roadmaps for the Clueless and Hopeful discussion
Why: ‘cuz it’ll be fun!

I’ll post again as we get closer to the date, but please do RSVP if you’d like to attend so that I’ll know how many folks to expect. You don’t have to have read the book to attend–you can just join in the discussion and meet poly folks, anyway!

Want to join in the discussion but aren’t in Chicago? Log on to the Poly Weekly Book Club Skypecast on Saturday, January 26th at 1:00 p.m.

3:00 Topic: Ten Poly Vocab Words You Need to Know
Think you know what “polyamory,” “primary/secondary/tertiary,” “NRE,” “monoamorous,” “monogamist,” “nonintimate sex,” “Vee,” “sweetie,” “significant other,” “HBB,” and “love-type thing” mean? Minx discusses Ravenscroft’s definitions of these terms from his book.

11:30 Poly in the Media
Alan’s new roundup of Polyamory in the News, including:

16:50 Feedback
Nobilis comments that he was bothered by Alan’s last Poly in the Media segment; Alan writes in an apology for the confusion and that any insult to monogamous folks was unintentional

18:45 Feedback and New Topics
DDog asks about a potential new topic: can poly people have foster kids?; Serena asks about how to meet poly people and if you’re “really” poly if you’re single–how do you meet poly people?; Poly Weekly episodes 103 and 104 did cover being poly and single, but if you have advice on where to meet people, please call in!

25:00 Wrap-up
Questions? Comments? Feedback? Email cunningminx@gmail.com or call the listener comment line at 206-202-POLY. And hey, why not attach an audio comment to that email? :-) Check out PolyWeekly at polyweekly.libsyn.com. Thanks for listening!

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